Friday, March 6, 2009

This Was Funny, So I Took It

When God's Parents Lost Him
Trinitarians insist that whenever we see the word "Jesus" in the Bible, we can be sure the Bible writers were referring to God the Son. They claim this was God walking in the land of Israel. So if Jesus is God .....

Now the parents of God went to Jerusalem every year at the feast of the Passover. And when God was twelve years old, they went up according to custom and when the feast was ended, as they were returning, God stayed behind in Jerusalem. The parents of God did not know it, but supposing God to be in their company they went a day's journey, and they sought God among their kinsfolk and acquaintances and when they did not find God, they returned to Jerusalem, seeking God. After three days they found God in the temple, sitting among the teachers, listening to them and asking them questions and all who heard God were amazed at the understanding of God and His answers. And when they saw God they were astonished and the mother of God said to him, "God, why have you treated us so? Behold, your father and I have been looking for you anxiously." And God said to them, "How is it that you sought me? Did you not know that I must be in the house of my Father?" And they did not understand the saying which God spoke to them. And God went down with them and came to Nazareth and God was obedient to them and the mother of God kept all these things in her heart. And God increased in wisdom and in stature and in favor with God and man.-Luke 2:40-52

Holy Spirit Absurdities
If the Holy Spirit is the 3rd person of the Trinity then:

Now the LORD spoke to Moses, saying, "See, I have called by name Bezalel, the son of Uri, the son of Hur, of the tribe of Judah. "I have filled him with [the third person of the Trinity] in wisdom, in understanding, in knowledge-Exodus 31:1-3

Do not cast me away from Your presence And do not take Your [third person of the Trinity] from me.-Psalm 51:11

Behold, My Servant, whom I uphold; My chosen one in whom My soul delights. I have put My [third person of the Trinity] upon Him; He will bring forth justice to the nations.-Isaiah 42:1

I will not hide My face from them any longer, for I will have poured out My [third person of the Trinity] on the house of Israel," declares the Lord GOD.-Ezekiel 39:29

It will come about after this that I will pour out My [third person of the Trinity] on all mankind; And your sons and daughters will prophesy, Your old men will dream dreams, Your young men will see visions.-Joel 2:28

"As for me, I baptize you with water for repentance, but He who is coming after me is mightier than I, and I am not fit to remove His sandals; He will baptize you with [the third person of the Trinity] and fire-Matthew 3:11

Jesus, full of [the third person of the Trinity], returned from the Jordan and was led around by the Spirit in the wilderness-Luke 4:1

If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give [the third person of the Trinity to those who ask Him?-Luke 11:13

For He whom God has sent speaks the words of God; for He gives [the third person of the Trinity] without measure.-John 3:34

Therefore having been exalted to the right hand of God, and having received from the Father the promise of [the third person of the Trinity], Jesus has poured forth this which you both see and hear.-Acts 2:33

Now when the apostles at Jerusalem heard that Samaria had received the word of God, they sent to them Peter and John, who came down and prayed for them that they might receive [the third person of the Trinity] for [the third person of the Trinity] had not yet fallen on any of them... Then they laid their hands on them and they received [the third person of the Trinity]... Now when Simon saw that [the third person of the Trinity] was given through the laying on of the apostles' hands, he offered them money.-Acts 8:14-15

While Peter was still saying this, [the third person of the Trinity] fell on all who heard the word. And the believers from among the circumcised who came with Peter were amazed, because the gift of [the third person of the Trinity] had been poured out even on the Gentiles. For they heard them speaking in tongues and extolling God. Then Peter declared, Can any one forbid water for baptizing these people who have received [the third person of the Trinity] just as we have?"-Acts 10:43-47

But in my opinion she is happier if she remains as she is; and I think that I also have [the third person of the Trinity].-1 Corinthians 7:40

Did you receive [the third person of the Trinity] by the works of the Law, or by hearing with faith? Are you so foolish? Having begun in [the third person of the Trinity], are you now being perfected by the flesh?-Galatians 3:2-3

By this you know [the third person of the Trinity]: every spirit that confesses that Jesus Christ has come in the flesh is from God.-1 John 4:2

On the Lord's Day I was in the Spirit.-Revelation 1:10 (It originally had the alternate rendering but my conscience will not let me post the alternate rendering due to the fact that it is from the book of Revelation and I do not want to be guilty of breaking the commandment at Revelation 22:18-19.